Dinner with Geneviève

Wednesday is my free day so Geneviève took me to dinner at one of her favorite restaurants. It was just at the end of the street across from our building but at her glacial pace it took us about 10 minutes to walk there. The restaurant was contained in a small room that featured what I personally would call "crap" but what some more enlightened people might call "art" covering every inch of the walls. The 5 tables were waited by a single woman who also cooked and ran the bar. When we arrived Geneviève and the woman greeted warmly and exchanged small gifts.

I was told I had to try the aubergines, so I did, and followed them with a chicken dish. Geneviève took her usual. She also ordered a half-liter of Bordeaux which I was happy to taste but which she ended up doing most of the work on: "je bois comme un trou," I'm drinking like a hole, she repeated many times throughout the dinner.

She told me stories about herself as a young woman, about her children, and about her life. She too lived in Switzerland for a time, just after the war, and it seems that this is the period in her life that generated the most interesting memories. For example:

The Good Lord came down from heaven to see how things were going. He found himself in Switzerland. Spotting a farm, he realized his thirst. He approached the farm and the farmer greeted him, 'good morning, my Lord.' 'Good morning, farmer! What a beautiful country you live in. And such healthy animals. It seems you lead quite a nice life.' 'Yes, my Lord. Is there anything I can do for you?' 'Well, I'm quite thirsty, might you have a glass of milk?' 'Of course, that'll be 10 franks.'

She told me she hadn't been able to tell most of her stories about Switzerland to anyone, not even her children, because she knew they wouldn't believe them. We tried to explain the Swiss to ourselves. We failed. Of course there are exceptions, but an incredible lack of suffering removes the Swiss people from the common experience the rest of us know as "life," we decided. I realized that not once did I see a musician trying to eke out a living by playing in the Zurich street. Nobody ever asked me for money. "Il faut prendre chaque opportunité de souffrir du monde," Geneviève told me. One must take every opportunity to suffer at the hands of the world. This will stick with me for a while.

Geneviève never wanted to have children. In hindsight she realizes that it was her husband who wanted them, and her biology that allowed her to concede. But having children changed her mindset completely. It was just another way in which she suffered at the hands of the world. And she became a better person for it.

The food was nothing special but throughout the meal I saw more and more of myself in the old lady sitting across the table from me. At the end she had a chocolate mousse and I an espresso and then we walked back slowly, her arms grasping mine for support the entire way.

I'm still annoyed when she interrupts my studying to tell me a story, or when she asks too many questions about my dinner. But I try to remind myself that she's a human being who's lived a lifetime of adventures and that I need to respect her.